Monday, November 7, 2022

Heading Home



 George, Sayuni, and I had a chance to debrief the marriage workshop this afternoon before I headed to Kilimanjaro Airport. The feedback we received was very positive. In fact one pastor is planning to have a marriage workshop at his church the first week of December and he wants George and Sayuni to lead it. This is exciting to us because our goal has been to train motivated people to go into their churches and areas and hold workshops for their congregations and villages. This was our first stab at training trainers and we are encouraged by the response. Most of the pastors and wives who attended are planning to go back to their communities and do the training.

On the way to the airport I actually saw Mt. Kilimanjaro!! This is my ninth visit to Tanzania and as I mentioned in my first post, I have never seen it on the ground in daylight--it has always been encased in clouds. My driver stopped by the side of the road so I could take a picture:


The day after the marriage workshop I had time to hear the story of Luka, one of the two people Geroge and Sayuni have helping them and who did some translation for me. He has an incredible story that I won't go into detail here, but he is a Maasai man and has made some decisions in following Jesus that has created a lot of hard feelings from his family. He married a woman, Brenda, who is from a different tribe and his parents have not accepted her. A Maasai man is supposed to marry Maasai women. He can't take his wife to his parents village, in fact. I was impressed with his faith, his attitude, and his work ethic. Here is a picture of Luka, Brenda, and their daughter, Mylene (which I think means "mercy' in Swahili).


I want to thank everyone who prayed for this trip!

Saturday, November 5, 2022

Marriage Workshop

 We held the marriage workshop on Thursday and Friday. Fourteen couples aattended which included three bishops and their wives. This is the first marriage workshop that we have given where the majority of pastors were from the Lutheran church. Since Tanzania was a German colony until the end of WW1, the Lutheran church is well established here. We have had one or two Lutheran pastors attend in the past, but they were never the majority: the vast majority of pastors have been Pentecostal at other workshops and this is the first one where they were in the minority--five of them. There was one pastor from a denomination I wasn't familiar with and several were Anglican pastors.


The workshop went well. The pastors and their wives were hightly motivated to take the information that we presented and try to bring it to their congregations. The culture is so patriarchal and the church in many ways just reinforces the great inequality and we spent the first day focusing on the scriptures and especially Jesus and his attitude toward and treatment of women. We were pleased with how well-received our presentations were and how the pastors and bishops wanted to start sharing what they had learned with their churches. Below is a picture of Sayuni speaking.


The couple married the longest had been married for 40 years and the couple with the fewest years had been married two and a half years. They didn't have anyone to take care of their daughter so they brought her with them. 


I am grateful to God for the opportunity to hold this marriage workshop and the positive response of the pastors and their wives. 

Wednesday, November 2, 2022

Preparations

 Yesterday we visited the venue where we will be holding our marriage workshop today. Someone she knows recommended it and reserved it, but since she had not seen it we drove there to inspect. She was pleased with what she saw and then informed the person responsible for setting up the room how she wanted it laid out. The 20 couples that will be attending will be staying here as well. We are staying at a hotel about 12 miles away. Here are some pictures of it. The first picture is the entrance, the second of the hall where we will meet, and the last a different picture of the courtyard.




I spent most of the day preparing myself for the workshop. I haven't given this in over 3 years and I needed to spend a good amount of time revising and becoming familiar with the material again.

Tuesday, November 1, 2022

On the Road

Yesterday morning we departed from Arusha at 9:30 and headed for Dodoma, the capital city of Tanzania. We traveled approximately 260 miles and it took us 6 1/2 hours. The roads were good but they were 2 lanes with some passing lanes every so often. From the outskirts of Arusha to the outskirts of Dodoma there was very little traffic but the highway went through many small villages and the speed limit was 30 mph in every village so while we could go 75 mph outside of the villages, we lost a lot of time poking along for a mile or two while passing through the villages. Every once in a while you would see a "Cattle Crossing" sign. One time we encountered cattle crossing the highway:


 Over the last four or so years Dodoma has gone and is going through a rapid transition. In 1974 the leaders made the decision that they would move the capital from Dar es Salaam on the coast to the center of the country and Dodoma was chosen as the site. Not much happened for about 40 years or so. Most of the government departments and offices stayed in Dar. A previous president of the country gave the order that all of the government would move to Dodoma by a certain deadline. This has happened and is happening. I was here in 2019 and the amount of new construction is amazing. The population has exploded and so have prices. Rents have tripled and many of the people who lived in Dodoma can no longer afford to live here and so have moved out to find more afforadable housing.

Tomorrow we prepare for the marriage workshop that will be all day Thursday and Friday. We will stay in Dodoma Saturday so I will be able to do some couples counseling for any couples who would like to meet with me. We will then head back to Arusha on Sunday.

Monday, October 31, 2022

Lameloki

This morning we headed south about 30 miles to the Maasai village of Lameloki. Although it is closer, it took just as much time to arrive as it did to Kimokouwa because we traveled most of the way on dirt roads. It started out in average condition for Africa and continued to get worse--more and larger ruts we had to naviage around and the last 25 minutes or so their was a deep layer of fine dirt on it. We drove in a cloud of dust literally. We were following another vehicle that was going with us to Lameloki and there were numerous times we had to stop because we couldn't see anything outside our vehicle. I have ridden on very rutted roads in East Africa before some even worse than this one in terms of ruts and enormous potholes, but never in that kind of dust. We were way back in the bush and we followed one of the men who lived there on his motorbike to find our way out. But the fine dirt was so think he was fishtailing much of the time. I was impresseed that he could stay on his motorbike, frankly. Most of the people who live here really never leave. A few people have motorbikes but most don't. It is an hours walk to get to the nearest public transportation. Here is a picture that might give you a little sense of what it was like. It actually got much worse than this picture at times.


 Our destination was an "orphanage" with 40 children. I put orphanage in quotation marks because it isn't like a normal orphange. None of the children live there, although the women are trying to raise money to build some dorms for them. Many of them live with very poor grandparents and that is where they sleep. But the two women who founded and run the "orphange" have paid for their school uniforms and they make sure the children attend school. After school they come to the "orphange" where they receive a meal and they have programs for different age groups. Some of the girls are learning to sew, for example. The two pictures below show the welcomr we received when we arrived and the two women who run the "orphanage' with George and Sayuni. Because I was giving a talk on marriage, a number of older single and married women attended as well as a few husbands.




Geroge and Sayuni had purchased some simple school supplies for the children and they asked me to hadn them out.


You might notice the purple bags the school supplies were in. Tanzania has outlawed the use of plastic bags throughout the country so they now use these cloth kind of bags.

I gave a brief talk to everyone about how we are God's beloved sons and daughters and then the children went somewhere else and I gave a shortened marrage talk, with emphasis on women being equal partners, not second class citizens. George translated for me.


Sunday, October 30, 2022

Kimokouwa

 Yesterday we traveled to the Maasai village, Kimokouwa. It is approximately 50 miles due north of Arusha and we were only about 2 miles from the Kenyan border. It took us about  1 1/4 hours to get there and most of the drive was through semi-arid land. The short wet season goes from the end of October until mid-December and the rains are late in coming. My weather app says there is a 40% chance of thunderstorms on Friday, but other than that there is no rain in the forecast for the next week. 

The church we met in was constructed in 1984 and it is the only Maasai church in the area. Some of the people, mostly women, had to walk 1 1/2 hours to get there. George and Sayuni arranged for all those who had gathered--approxiamtely 100--to eat before we met. According to them the people don't have a lot of food and they thought that some might only have one meal a day: ugali (a type of stiff corn flour porridge) and milk.   

When we arrived this is the road that led to the village:


As we pulled up to the church, the children had gathered to sing and dance. We then entered the church, introductions were made, and I was invited to speak. In Maasai culture women are 3rd class citizens coming behind men and cattle (cattle are wealth). Girls are given as wives when they are 12 and 13 y.o. and a man can have as many wives as he can afford. I spent a lot of time from scripture making the case that God created men and women as equals and both men and women are beloved children of God. My hope was to instill in the wives (there were only a few men there) that they are deeply loved and of infinite worth no matter what demeaning messages they may hear from others.

Below is a picture of the church and those gathered in:


The last picture is of my translator, Lukas, who is Maasai and works part time for George and Sayuni and me. He is a great young man who is married and has an 18 month old daughter. Lukas translated my English into the Maasai language. The official language of Tanzania is Swahili.












The Ways of God

 After meeting with George and Sayuni in Africafe yesterday, we were walking back to the hotel when we ran into some of their friends. They introduced me to Joseph and his wife (whose name I didn't get) who is a pastor and on staff with World Vision Tanzania in charge of "Faith and Development" for the whole country. As we talked, I asked him if he knew Daniel, the World Vision Staff person from Tanzania who sponsored the first pilot Marriage Workshop in 2015. Daniel moved to work at World Vision Kenya in Nairobi and I haven't seen him since about 2017. I discovered that not only does he know him, they are good friends and Daniel is in charge of "Faith and Development" for all of East Africa. Joseph told me that Daniel had just spent time in Arusha but had just left the day before. He called him on the spot and gave the phone to me and I was able to say "hi" and have a brief conversation with him. Sayuni then talked with him (in Swahili of course) and after we had said our good-byes to Joseph and his wife she told me that Daniel really wants us to come to Nairobi to do a pastors and wives marriage workshop--he is willing to set everything up. From what Sayuni reported, he sounded highly motivated for this to happen. It also turns out that Joseph is passionate about supporting marriages and in fact held a marriage workshop with some pastors from Florida in August, and was very interested to learn about what George, Sayuni, and I are doing. He lives in Dar es Salaam and wants us to come to Dar to offer some marriage workshops there. 

What is so amazing about this is that we have been trying to get some traction and support for our work here but so far it has been just us doing this ministry. World Vision Tanzania sponsored the first pilot workshop as I mentioned, but World Vision's funding decreased the next year and they decided not to support financially the workshops. But in a chance encounter--George and Sayuni didn't know they were in Arusha and hadn't seem them for a while--it suddently looks as though a door is opening for us to expand these workshops. The three of us were pretty excited about this! I would appreciate your prayers that God would guide us in these potentially new opportunities.

These are two pictures from the pilot marriage workshop we gave in Arusha in 2015. This is where I met George who worked for World Vision Tanzania at the time and was my translator.




Saturday, October 29, 2022

Getting Acclimated

 Arusha is approximately 4500 feet above sea level, so even though it is located about 3 degrees south latitude, the temperature is pleasant. The forecast for every day that I am here is highs in the mid 80's and lows in the low to mid 60's and there isn't high humidity.  

I am meeting with George and Sayuni for dinner and planning in a few hours. Tomorrow we will travel to the Maasai village in Kimokouwa and do a couples session. Kimokouwa is about 50 miles north of Arusha and very close to the border wth Kenya. At this point I don't know how many couples will attend the session nor exactly what we will present, but will find that out this evening when I meet with George and Sayuni. 

Below are pictures of the front of the New Safari Hotel and my favorite hangout when I stay in Arusha, Africafe. It is located on the same block as the hotel and probably no more that 50 yards door to door. They have great coffee and food and this is where George and Sayuni and I will meet to discuss tomorrow's plans.






Friday, October 28, 2022

Back At Last!!

It has been thtree years and three months since I last left Tanzania. I never expected that the hiatus would last so long and I have honestly missed spending time in East Africa. I have been traveling to East Africa long enough that I am aware of changes in procedures over time. Ever since my first visit in 2014, before they would let you into the Kilimanjaro terminal you had to show that you had a yellow fever vacination. I actually have stapled my yellow international shot record to the back side of my passport so I didn't always have to go fishing for it. They checked your shot record outside the building. This evening when I arrived, they didn't ask for proof of a yellow fever vaccine but you had to show proof that you had had the COVID vaccinations. Interesting. I understand why they wanted to see proof of COVID vaccines, but yellow fever is a far deadlier disease and I am suprised that they jettisoned that procedure.

We flew in an enormous aircraft--there were a bizillion people on it and the vast majority were Europeans heading for Kilimanjaro to either trek up Mt. Kilimanjaro or visit safarfi parks. The parking lot was filled with safari vehicles waiting to pick up the guests and take them to varying safari parks across Tanzania--there are many, many fine safarai parks here. The Serengeti is located in Tanzania. The destination for my flight was Dar es Salaam and only about 10% of the passangers stayed on the aircraft. Some passangers would board from Kilimanjaro, but it wouldn't be that many. 

My driver whom I always use is Mr. Mwanga. He met me a the airport with a big smile and a hug. He was a friend of one of the World Vision leaders in Tanzania, Daniel, who first hired him for me and I have been using him ever since. He is a Muslim man who has three sons. A number of years ago he took me to his home to meet his wife and two of his three sons who were there, and took me to visit his sons school on another visit. He is a friendly person, but he doesn't speak much English and I don't speak Swahili, so it's tough to communicate somtimes. The picture below is of the visit I made to visit Mr. Mwanga's son 6 years ago.



The next two nights I will be staying at the New Safari Hotel. It is a hotel owned by the Lutheran Church, and George and Sayuni are friends with the bishop and they get a discount for my room. (Tanzania was a German colony called Tanganyika until the end of WWI and so the Lutheran church is the largest protestant church here.) But it was so great to arrive after 3 years and the employee at the desk recognized me and greeted me warmly, He said it had really been tough with COVID but this past year things are going better. I asked him if had been laid off, and he said he wasn't but everyone had to work one less day.  

In any case, I have arrived, will spend Saturday trying to deal with jetlag and reorient myself to the various workshops we will be doing.

Wednesday, October 26, 2022

Getting Close

 I have a list of things to do about as long as an arm in preparation for my flight to Tanzania. I have to pack more things than I normally would because I can't just run out to the drugstore to purchase something. My backpack is going to be like a mini-medicine cabinet. If I catch a cold or cut myself or something else, I can't just run over to CVS and pick up what I need. So I bring cold medicine, Advil, medicine for other things that I might get. I bring some sleeping pills for the long flights: one is 7 hours and the other is 8 hours and I can't sleep on airplanes for some reason. If I can time when I sleep, it can help me to adjust to the jetlag. I am schudled to arrive at Kilimanjaro Friday evening at 8:10 pm. That means if everything is on time I will arrive at my hotel in Arusha somewhere between 10:00 and 11:00 pm. I had George and Sayuni not schedule anything for Saturday so I can begin to adjust to Tanzanian time. 

They sent me the poster below to show how they are advertising our marriage workshop:




Monday, October 24, 2022

Zeroing In

 It's hard to believe that I will be leaving for Tanzania in three days! Since 2008 I have travelled to East Africa at least once a year and sometimes twice a year and that ended with the onset of COVID. My last trip occurred in August of 2019. So I am excited about going there again after a three year hiatus.

George and Sayuni sent me the itinerary for my trip:

If you look on the far right of the schedule you will see the dates of the events. In Africa they put the day followed by the month followed by the year instead of month, day, and year as we do. The trip from Arusha to Dodoma takes about five hours by car. Dodoma is the capital city and is in the center of Tanzania. I first visited Dodoma in 2019 where we did a marriage workshop. The one thing I will do that is not on the schedule is some couples counseling in Arusha later in the day on 11/5/2022 after we return from Dodoma. On Sunday I will worship at George and Sayuni's church and on Monday I will start my trek back to Boston. I would greatly apprciate your prayers for this trip, for safe travels, and an effective ministry!

Wednesday, October 19, 2022

Preparations for Tanzania

 It has been about seven years since I have had an entry on my blog. But I thought I would bring it back to life in preparation for my trip to Tanzania next week. I am heading out on Thursday evening, October 27th and returning early afternoon on Tuesday, November 8th. I fly from Boston to Amsterdam where I have a several hour layover and then head out for Kilimanjaro airport, Tanzania, and arrive in the evening of October 28th. They are seven hours ahead of EDT. 

I have probably been to Tanzania about eight times, but I have never been able to see Mt. Kilimanjaro in broad daylight because it is always socked in with clouds. One time at dusk I was heading to the airport and I was able to make it out in the distance, but it was fairly dark and hard to see. Maybe on this trip I will see it in broad daylight. There have been a few occasions that after taking off, Mt. Kilimanjaro has been visible above the clouds. Here is a picture I took from the aircraft as I was leaving Tanzania in 2016 .


I plan to discuss more of the trip before I head out and I hope to keep it up to date while I am in Tanzania.


Thursday, October 15, 2015

Gorillas in the Mist

Before heading up to Gulu, Beth and I are taking a little vacation to visit part of Uganda that I have never been to. Beth has wanted to do a gorilla trek since she found out about them a number of years ago, so we decided to go on one. In the southwestern corner of Uganda at the borders of Rwanda, the Congo, and Uganda are mountains where the only living mountain gorillas live. Naturalists estimate that there are only 700 of them remaining in the wild, about 400 in Uganda and the rest in Rwanda and the Congo. They live in families from approximately 8 to 20. Over the course of years, naturalists have habituated the gorillas to human beings. They are naturally afraid of humans, but because of the habituation process they view us as neutral animals.

The way the gorilla trek works is that trackers go into the woods around 7:00 am (gorillas make "nests" of leaves on the ground and sleep from 7:00 pm to 7:00 am) at the place they saw them the previous day.They then try to find where they have moved and when they find them they radio to the head guides their current locations. Those going on the trek are at a central meeting point gather at 8:00 am where we are briefed about mountain gorillas, the trek, and the do's and don'ts of the trek. Then we are divided into groups no larger than eight--there were only twelve this morning so we were two groups of six. (The maximum number of people allowed trek each day is forty.) We then head out tracking different gorilla groups.

The first person is an armed guard then the head guide, followed by the trekkers and porters (people to carry your back pack, etc.) and the last person is an armed guard. Both guards have a machete to cut vines and branches as you proceed. There are mountain elephants and leopards in the forest so the guards are there to protect us should one appear. They would shoot some warning shots to scare them away and only in the most rare circumstances would they actually shoot the animal. I haven't heard of that actually happening.

We ascended the mountain which must have been at a 45 degree angle. We started at around 6000 feet and I don't know how high we went, but we might have ascended 1000 feet or so. It was very slippery because it is the rainy season and it rains almost every day. You can go 1/2 hour and find gorillas or three hours and find them. We were fortunate and found the group we were looking for in 30 to 45 minutes. They were were all feeding on berries in this very tall tree on the slope of the mountain. This group had about 10--two silverbacks and two babies. After about an hour (the length of time permitted to observe them) they came down from the tree and started feeding on the ground. We carefully approached where they were eating and came within 10-20 feet of them. Below is a picture of the silverback leading the group and I took this picture with my iPhone at a distance of 10-15 feet. It was pretty cool!



The whole area is amazingly beautiful. The view from our lodge is spectacular.





Friday, July 10, 2015

Day 40: We Made It!

I liked Levison's summary in today's devotion.
1. We learn that the Spirit's anchor is Jesus.
2. We learn...that what the Spirit says is rooted in Scripture.
3. "The work of the Spirit is not just something brand new. It is something old made new for us. The Spirit...brings ancient Scripture to life."
4. We learn "[t]hat the Spirit--the bride of Christ, as well--is hospitable, generous, expansive beyond belief. The Spirit and the bride don't limit their invitation to the genteel, the sophisticated the self-reliant. They invite anyone who will listen, people with parched throats, people without the right coins in their pockets. It's a dangerous invitation."

What a great way to end.

I hope that those of you who persevered through the 40 Days with the Holy Spirit have not only gained a better knowledge about the person and work of the Holy Spirit, but that you have experienced the Holy Spirit in perhaps a new way. My prayer is that the Holy Spirit works powerfully not only in our own lives, but in the life of UCC Medfield!


Thursday, July 9, 2015

Day 39: Almost There

In today's devotion Levison uses probably the most well-known text about the coming of the Holy Spirit, the text that is read at Pentecost every year, Acts 2:1-13. However, he takes a different angle on it from any that I have ever heard. Rather than focus on the event itself, he focuses on what goes on behind the scenes: stayed, prayed, and studied. Once again he wants to divert our attention from the spectacle of the Holy Spirit that some have, to the more mundane, ordinary, ways in which the Holy Spirit works. The Holy Spirit uses our efforts for preparing ourselves to be useful vessels. His prayer is my prayer:

Holy Spirit
Fiery ecstasy
Language maker

Don't let me come unsuspecting to Pentecost
or arrive ill-equipped at ecstasy

Sharpen my will to study
Hone my mind to think
Whet my appetite to learn

And when I part my lips
and breathe out words
god's praiseworthy acts--let them come first.
Amen

Wednesday, July 8, 2015

Day 38: Make Disciples

Make disciples. "The eleven must go. They must create learners--disciples.They must baptize them. Then they must teach them to follow every last detail of Jesus's commands, not with inventiveness, not with astonishing oratorical flourish, not with awesome miracles." Simple to say, more difficult to do. I am reminded of II Timothy 2:1-2: "You then, my child, be strong in the grace that is in Christ Jesus' and what you have heard from me through many witnesses entrust to faithful people who will be able to teach others as well."

So the task at hand is to live the teachings ourselves, and to teach others. What we have the tendency to do, however, is to see Jesus' teachings kind of like a smorgasbord from which we pick and choose. We like the ones about being loved, about forgiveness, but we don't like the hard parts about suffering and surrendering ourselves to him lock, stock, and barrel. 'A dollop of things that make me feel good, and a dab of that which I won't find to inconvenient."

I like his prayer:

Today I pray that you, with the father and the son,
will embrace a shared purpose
To fire in me a passion to obey everything Jesus commanded
To stir in me a passion to teach others
To obey everything Jesus commanded

To forgive me when I don't obey
To forgive them when they don't...

Tuesday, July 7, 2015

Day 37: Pressure Cooker of Trials

Let's just say that I found this devotion rather bracing. Who wants to suffer persecution? I want the Holy Spirit in my life, but I would prefer the Holy Spirit without persecution, or really without anything seriously negative in my life to be honest. I think Levison gets it just right when he writes,

"So I've come to face it: I tend to like a gospel that tells me everything will work out in the end and that the Spirit will give me everything I need for abundant living in the meantime. I don't want a Spirit that shows up at the last minute to give me words that seal my fate."

The truth be told, I think most of us want the easy road and when it is easy we attribute it to the Holy Spirit. Fortunately, though, God knows better and promises to be with us on the hard road, even the most difficult road when things look bleak. Jesus promises us the presence of the Holy Spirit to give us what we need.

Monday, July 6, 2015

Day 36:Spirit on All Flesh

You have probably heard Joel 2:28-29, today's text, read during worship a number of times. It is frequently read on Pentecost  Sunday. Levison tells us that this text "bursts the wineskins" of Numbers 11 in two directions: horizontal and vertical. I liked his imagery. He notes that this prophecy cuts across all national/ethnic divisions. It also cuts across every division within a given culture. It's pretty radical stuff: "The Spirit melts the glue that holds together society, as we know it, in social tiers." Are we ready for that? It seems to me that in the abstract as a kind of principle it sounds great. But when it cuts into our privilege, and interrupts the way that we are used to living life, I wonder if we are so eager to embrace the Spirit's action.

I find my own self-interest interwoven throughout the things that I believe, and have discovered it is difficult, very difficult to know where my belief is motivated by my self-interest even though I can make a good theological case, or so I think. My capacity for self-deception, which I have mentioned numerous times in my sermons, is nearly limitless.

I loved this stanza of his prayer:

Holy Spirit...

Topple my world with your benevolence
Barrage my barricades with your generosity
Flood my heart with your compassion...


Sunday, July 5, 2015

Day 35: Blossoming in the Presence of the Holy Spirit

"For those of us who insist on identifying God's presence in the world, God's absence is tough to stomach. Maybe it's not God's absence so much as Gods withdrawal." I think he captures my feelings about this exactly. I want to experience God's presence in my life--moment to moment--not his absence. I hate it when I feel that God is absent from me. And yet, at times God withdraws for God's own reasons and we need to trust Him even then.

I thought his main point was well spoken in this morning's devotion. Yes, the Spirit is about self-preservation, conservation, and protection. There are promise for this throughout the Old and New Testaments. The Psalms are full of pleas for protection and self-preservation.

But, as Levison points out, the Spirit is not just about self-preservation, conservation, and protection. "The Spirit is about transformation." It is about God's love reaching out into the world and welcoming them in. The Holy Spirit is about outreach, about "Kingdom work," as I mentioned in my sermon this morning. We become transformed along with those "outsiders" who become "insiders." As he captures so well, "The Spirit's presence may allow for protection and comfort, but ultimately the Spirit is about transformation from the outside in--from outsiders who become insiders."

Saturday, July 4, 2015

Day 34: Speaking in Tongues

Today is July 4th and I want to wish everyone a great day!

Today's devotion focus is on what is called, "speaking in tongues," or the academic term is "glossolalia." Levison shares an experience he had many years back which probably was speaking in tongues although he is uncertain exactly what to call it. I have never had the experience of speaking in tongues although I am open to it if it happens to me. I think this text is more academic if you come from a denomination for which speaking in tongues isn't really part of the faith experience and if you have never had the experience.

Nevertheless, the principle of not elevating our spiritual experience in such a way that it puts us in the limelight, we become proud that we have experienced this (whatever it might be) and not others is important. Whatever spiritual experiences God gives us are meant to be received humbly, thankfully, and in a way which will build others up. It's a gift to be used for God's glory and our own and other's edification. The Holy Spirit isn't about gifting us to make us proud; rather, the Holy Spirit gifts us to grow in our faith and to bless others.